Community

Four years ago I started my new job... and while this is year four it still feels new... though I am now the administrator in our building that has been there the longest... the principal came a year after I did and the other assistant principal, with whom I worked for these last three years retired...and we have a new guy on board... (A GREAT new guy... Phil, yes the Phil of Phil and Sara, who are some of my best friends!) ... so I am not longer the newbie, but I know I still have a lot to learn...

I reflected on this being my fourth year on Friday night as I was attending our first home football game of the season.  I remember four years ago, showing up at that first game and being nervous... would the people at the ticket booth know who I was or not, how would I just walk through the ticket gate without paying and how exactly does one do crowd control at an event like that? Those were things I thought about at that time... Fast forward four years and I know the boosters working in the ticket booth, recognize many of the parents and community members who are in attendance, and look forward to cheering with the kids in the student section as we watch out team compete. 

Last night, as it worked out... combined my current job with my previous one... a student from my old school has transferred to my new school... I knew him a bit as a student, but had a stronger connection with his older siblings.  His family moved to Maine from Africa 15 years ago... there are three older siblings that I know, and it's possible there are a couple more with whom I am unfamiliar...  I saw this student a couple of weeks ago in my school and it took a minute to register that this was a kid I already knew... he was with his father and when his dad saw me, he was so happy.  I got a hug and when he learned I was the assistant principal he was so pleased.  He said he was so happy for me and was glad I would be there to keep an eye on his son as I had with his other sons... that was nice...  So, at the game last night the parents arrived and the father brought his wife over to see me and she gave me a huge hug and said she was so happy to hear I was there.  They both talked about how proud they are of me and how wonderful it is that I have this new position...they describe it as powerful...but that is their word... I chatted with them and shared some laughter about a crazy church experience (where I went to his church, he is a minister, after he had hounded me to do so... and I agreed to go but explained my faith in god was nonexistent at that time and told him I would come to observe to see if it was a place I wanted to go and specifically asked him to let me blend in with the crowd... well a six foot six white woman did not blend in well in a tiny church filled with African immigrants... and this minister/father of my students called me to the front of his church to introduce me... he did so as someone he respected and appreciated for the work I did with his kids... and proceeded to tell the church of my struggle with faith especially since the death of my mother and asked the 'brothers' of the church to surround me with love and light and help me find my shepherd!!! And asked me to be baptized with them at their next service....ummmm... Needless to say being hugged by a group of men was not what I had anticipated for my first experience at his church and I was not happy about it... for being so publicly addressed...and had told him that after the fact.....in hindsight it is funny.. but at the time not so much!)  they then told me at the time,  he and his kids had told one of the 'brothers' I was coming and had told him I was his future fiance because he is taller than me and well, in their culture, a tall, large woman, is apparently well sought after ....and  after telling him there is still no ring on my finger  and more laughter they went off to find their seats... they told me their other kids would be arriving later and I was excited to see them.

I soon positioned myself on the bleachers in front of the student section and chatted with some of the kids.  Many parents came by and one put her hand on my shoulder and told me how much I rocked as I was laughing with the kids... Then the other assistant principal arrived and then the principal... and the game began... (we had a nice 9-11 tribute before the game... and yes, I got a little misty eyed! Always do!) Not long into the game two of the other kids from this family from my old school arrived... one of them, their daughter, I hardly knew... the other, now 21!!!  (I had him when he was in grades 6-8!) I knew very well.  I was so happy to see him, and he seemed to feel the same.  He gave me a big hug, no longer that little middle schooler, but still had his contagious smile and laugh and we chatted for a while... he said when he heard I was the AP at this school he said he thought that it would be a great job for me, explaining that as a teacher kids knew clearly what I expected of them and didn't want to mess with me, but also loved coming to my classes... so he said he figures I would be good for that kind of a job.  I thought that was sweet.  He struggled with learning, but he never complained about it, and always worked hard... he is now finishing his associates degree with plans to get his bachelor's soon... he said, "I'm still slow at school, but I get it done."  I told him I was so proud of him... I am so incredibly proud.  His work ethic was always strong... and his value for education has always been high... I asked him if he remembered the time, when he was a sixth grader...and we, along with 5 or 6 other kids, were in a small work room and the other kids had complained about different things like not having an eraser, or about the scratch paper being ripped too easily, or about the work being hard and he stopped working and put his pencil quietly on the table and just looked around the room and a tear rolled slowly down his very round face... When I asked him what was wrong the other students stopped working and looked at him... he took a breath and said to them something about how it made him sad to hear them complain about things for which he was grateful... he said that he came from a country that didn't have schools...let alone paper and pencils... he said that these kids were in a school where they can get a drink whenever they wanted to and he remembered being 3 or 4 years old and drinking from a mud puddle because they didn't have any other sources of water when he was in Africa... I remember how humbled the other students were... how none of them used that as a way to make fun of him (though many middle schoolers could)...ow they respected him more... and I remember the lump in my throat... and how it took me a minute to compose myself and thank him for sharing that with us... he nodded at me and picked up his pencil and continued working... It was a powerful moment for me in teaching... to see a student appreciate and value education so much...  When I talked to him about that last night, he didn't remember that exact moment... but he said he remembers being frustrated with kids who complained... and said that he knew he had to work harder but never complained because he was so thankful for the chance to learn.  I am so so proud of him!!!  Not long after that another of his siblings arrived, the oldest brother, who I coached in track.  He saw me and again I got a huge hug!  I called him Superman, his nickname in track, and he could not believe I remembered that. 

It was so cool to have the moments of reconnecting with former students and parents in between moments of connecting with my current students and families... That family made me realize how connected i had become in that community, the one I chose to leave four years ago... and made me realize that it has taken time, but I am, now, a part of this community... and those connections are growing deeper and wider... and I love that. 

This was our first week with kids and that game was a great way for it to end.  (Our team won, by the way, but that was definitely not the highlight of my night!)